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My Conditional Love

The love story of Romeo and Juliet, particularly the tragic death, is undoubtedly very popular but I dare say that most people do not know or ever address their minds to the fact that the death of the two lovers actually brought about the abrupt end to the long drown enmity between their two families- the Verona’s and the Montague’s.

Since love is said to come without limits and is expected to exist in highly committed relationships; between mother and child, family members, fraternities, comrades in arms, etc, then what existed between Romeo and Juliet can easily be termed ‘unconditional love’, at least for the little time it lasted.

The love that exists between parents and their children appears to rank most significant and arguably the strongest of relationships. As such, the term, ‘unconditional’ will be most apt in describing the love shared; at least when the children are in their infancy. The truth is, as the child grows up, the love of the parents and its manifestation will depend largely on the active participation of both the parents and the child. My people will say that it is the child that shows the willingness to be carried by stretching out his or her hands that will be carried.

I have continued to critically consider what we all refer to as ‘love’ and I have come to the conclusion that people always love for one reason or the other, whether the reason is obvious or not. In comparison to other couples who can boast of decades of their formal union, I probably do not have enough experience in marriage but with humility and a heart full of thanks, I can say that my marriage has worked so far. The truth is, long before I got married to my wife, Oluwaremilekun Adegoke Adeyemo, it was clear to my mind that I needed to be true to myself; ‘love is not cheap’. If I want her to love me, I must be ready to love her. It is for this reason that I have also continued to plead with her to help me to love her. As it will be foolhardy for me to think that she will continue to love me even if I refuse to fulfill my own part of the deal. In the same manner, it will be difficult for me to really love her if she refuses to fulfill her part of the deal.

The African Union (AU) as in the case of the earlier institution known as the Organization of African Union (OAU) was formed to promote continental peace, unity, and cooperation. Although the Organization has over the years helped to strengthen ties among African nations and settle disputes, it is still faced with many problems that have undermined its ability to achieve its goals. In the same manner, the Economic Community of West African States (ECOWAS), as founded in 1975 to encourage economic, social, and cultural development in West Africa has also continued to battle with its countless challenges. Apart from these two organizations their other organizations, treaties, and agreement that Africans have gone into to foster a united Africa but Africa it is not yet to unite. Maybe one of the things we need to come to terms with is the fact that GOD, for reasons best known to Him decided to spread the “milk and honey” in Africa across the continent. Simply put we need each other to survive and we cannot just walk across or over our neighbors to get what we want. Love cannot be taken for granted! Neighbors or relatives will not just love themselves just because they are neighbors or relatives. For us to have peace and development in Africa, I recommend my kind of love – ‘conditional love’. All hands must be on the deck for we all must continue to work very hard at integrating the continent from all fronts in order for all of us to bountifully reap from the harvest of the land.